“If you aren't good at loving yourself, you will have a difficult time loving anyone, since you’ll resent the time and energy you give another person that you aren't even giving to yourself.” Barbara De Angelis
Loving yourself is essential for living a healthy, happy life. How much you love yourself affects your relationships, your career, and how you cope with life when it brings you down. Loving yourself is to embrace who you truly are, understanding your strengths and accepting your imperfections. Loving yourself is not about being egoistic or self-important, which derives from a lack of self-confidence and not knowing who you truly are. Practising real self-love gives you the surety that you will not be enticed to engage in selfish behaviours.
When you love yourself, you are under no need to feel the prettiest, most talented or the most successful – self-criticism and judgement magically disappear. You see, when you love yourself, you are capable of giving so much of your love and kindness with an open heart to anyone without being worried of being hurt or used as a doormat. This is because, when you love yourself, you refuse to let anyone take advantage of you. And as you feel confident and safe in your love of self, you start drawing the love of others to you.
So where do you start?
How do you treat people that you love? Do the same for yourself.
Learn to say NO. Trust me, we all love people who speak their truth. It shows courage.
Focus on all your personal needs that contribute to your health and happiness.
“Self-care is never a selfish act—it is simply good stewardship of the only gift I have, the gift I was put on earth to offer to others.” Parker Palmer
Make a daily priority to do things that you like doing. Allow 30 minutes to 1 hour each day to do things that help you feel good or contribute to your self-growth.
Feed your body well and “listen” to it. Your body is like a barometer - pay attention to how you emotionally and physically feel because your feelings and thoughts affect you both mentally and physically.
Be attentive to the words that you speak especially the ones that you tell yourself.
Be proud of your achievements and praise yourself, just as you would with someone close to you.
Motivate yourself to do something that raises your vibration when you are feeling down. It could be listening to some upbeat music, meditation, breathing exercises or going for a walk…
And yes… stand in front of your mirror and say “I LOVE YOU” to yourself. Who doesn’t like to hear it? When we feel loved, we feel accepted. Practice it until it becomes natural to you.
When you love yourself first, you will notice how easy it is to love others with an open heart and to be really loved in return for who you really are.
Melanie is an Image Therapist, Facialist and Feminine Empowerment Coach based in central London. She offers Authentic Image Transformation from the inside out for women ready to elevate their personal and professional life.
Image from Unsplash - Photographer: Amy Shamblen